Early in my Christian life, I found myself doubting often. I would do something that I knew didn't please God, and heart searching questions always followed my sin. "How could you do that and really be a Christian? If there's a God, then why do these things keep happening?"

A few days after becoming a Christian, I found myself in my room crying out to God. Doubts flooded my soul. "Is there a God? Have you been brainwashed? Have you simply had an emotional experience?" I felt so confused. I called on God. It seemed like the only words I could say in those moments was, "Jesus, Oh Jesus, help me!" After crying out to God for several minutes, peace like a river flooded my soul. The Holy Spirit bore witness with my spirit that I was the child of God. I knew that I knew that Christ was real. It was deeper than emotion and broader than human understanding. It was a spiritual knowledge.

The Christian life is like a journey. All along the way, you make discoveries. You continue to learn and grow. The person who does not grow always ends up defeated. Many of the greatest discoveries about the Christian life have come as I've had to deal with doubts. I've learned to let doubt lead me to new heights of faith rather than force me to the depths of despair. I've also learned to identify the source of doubts. Before I came to know Christ, the source of my doubts were deep. They were of a profoundly spiritual nature. They went to the core of my being. I doubted because I had no vital relationship with God. I didn't have the assurance of God because I had no knowledge of God. God is Spirit. His Spirit wasn't present in my life. But after becoming a believer, the doubts that I experienced were only surface. The deepest part of mankind is the spirit of man. I no longer doubted on that level because "His Spirit bears witness with my spirit that I am a child of God" (Rom. 8:16). In other words, in the deepest part of my being I know that I am a child of God because the Holy Spirit lives in the deepest part of my heart.

He continually tells me that I'm God's child, that the blood of Christ is sufficient provision to cleanse me of all my sins. This isn't merely positional theology, but it's practical reality. Hallelujah! God's Spirit dwells deep within and continually tells me that I belong to Jesus and He belongs to me! I just know that I know that I know. It's deep down in my heart, and I just know it. It's not simply some kind of intellectual knowledge or an emotional feeling. It's spiritual. It's His presence in my life.

Then, what about the doubts? Where do they come from? Even though I have that deep assurance that Jesus is mine, I still have to deal with surface doubts. Those doubts come from areas of my life such as the intellectual and emotional. For instance, when I disobey God, it always leaves an intellectual or emotional scar on my inner being. I begin to question whether I am truly God's child. Even though I know in the deepest part of my heart that Christ's death on the cross is sufficient for my forgiveness, my reasoning often becomes scarred. I begin to doubt mentally that I'm the child of God. Or I may feel emotionally defeated and thus doubt whether I truly have eternal life. Once the sin has been confessed and I've truly repented, then I again rest in the confidence of Christ's salvation. The doubts were only surface. Thus, they were also temporary.

Intellectual doubts normally stem from an incorrect view of God, while emotional doubts often come from wrong actions and attitudes. Rather than believing what the Bible says about God and us, we often believe what our culture teaches us about Him. Consequently, we become defeated. Every victory we experience in Christ emanates from faith. Faith is foundation upon which victory is built in the Christian's life. But the faith foundation can't be built upon anything but the truth of God's Word. We must stand on the promises of the Bible if we are to practically experience victory over doubts.

Intellectual doubts flow from a lack knowledge of God's Word, but emotional doubts are often caused by disobedience to the Word of God. By faith in Christ, we enter into a relationship with God. We become His child. However, when we allow sin into our lives, our intimacy with Him is broken. We no longer experience practically the depth, width, breadth, and height of His love. His love for us hasn't changed. We are still His children, but our fellowship with Him has been shattered. That fellowship can only be restored when we confess and repent of our sins. It's only when traveling down the highway of holiness that we have intimacy with God who is absolute holiness.