DAILY VIDEO DEVOTIONAL
Dealing with Conflict
Today in our devotion time, I want to speak to you about dealing with conflict in your marriage. Now I know when you get married, you think, “Boy, everything is going to be great.” You love each other, and you’re showing your best Ps and Qs and trying to impress each other. You don’t have the kind of conflict you do once you get married. Then once you enter into that relationship, conflict arises. How do you deal with conflict?
Well, the Bible says in 1 Peter, chapter 3, verse 7, that we’re to deal with our wives in an understanding manner and to treat our wives as a fellow heir of the grace of life. I’ve found two principles that have helped me with dealing with conflict in my marriage.
The first thing is to really respect my wife. So many times what happens as men is we think we’re right. We know. We understand. We’ve got it. If we were honest, we have to admit we don’t respect. We don’t view our wife’s opinion as highly as we ought to view her opinion. But 1 Peter says they’re a fellow heir of the grace of life. What does that mean? That means…hey listen…they have some views sometimes that are better than ours. They have the grace of life. They have everything God has put in you, God has put in them.
You need to respect what they have to say. I think so many times a woman needs that. I know early on in my marriage, this was a great problem for me because I thought I knew it all. I was proud. I was arrogant. God had to break me. God had to show me I was not respecting my wife.
We take that verse, “Wives, submit to your husbands…” But before it ever says in Ephesians 5, “Wives, submit to your husbands,” it says, “…submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” That word submission means an attitude of respect. You’re to respect her just as she is to respect you. But you are to respect her. There needs to be that level of respect in your life for your wife, for her viewpoint.
The second thing is to deal with her in an understanding way. Now what does that mean to deal with her in an understanding way? So many times, we men and women (as men and women are so different) deal with issues from a whole different paradigm. What happens is we don’t understand. It’s so easy for us, and we have to…
I mean, it’s something you really have to work at, because a woman thinks differently. A woman is made differently, she is created differently, and she thinks differently. So many times for us as men, it’s hard for us to understand. But we have to commit ourselves. I mean, this is not something you just walk into, and it happens so easily. It’s something you have to concentrate on, and you have to say, “Explain this to me. Help me to understand why you feel this way. What is it that’s causing you…?”
Sometimes it’s emotions. Sometimes it’s something in the past. It could be a number of things. Who knows? But you need to try to understand what it is, especially when there’s conflict. Instead of just getting your spiritual boxing gloves on, try to understand where she is coming from. If you will do that, I believe God will bless, and God will enable you to work through those problems. He will give you understanding, and he will show you how to love your wife like Christ loves the church.
Ephesians : Chapter 5
22) Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23) For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24) Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25) Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26) to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27) and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28) In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29) After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30) for we are members of his body. 31) “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[c] 32) This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33) However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Book of the Month
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About Sammy Tippit Ministries
STM has been providing inspiration and help around the world for nearly 50 years. Sammy Tippit, founder and president, is a world renowned counselor, teacher and evangelist with experience serving and helping people in over 80 countries. Sammy provides materials that help people tackle a broad array of social, societal, psychological and spiritual issues. He is particularly passionate about making materials accessible to other countries around the world. Sammy is married to Debara “Tex” Tippit, and they have two children and five grandchildren.
Sammy Tippit Ministries is a registered 501c3 non-profit organization.
Contact: info@sammytippit.org
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