RUN LIKE A CHAMPION

Often I’m asked, “Do you ever have doubts about God?” Most people are surprised to hear that a Christian author, international evangelist, and longtime follower of Christ still struggles with doubts. But I do. I learned a long time ago that it’s no sin to doubt your beliefs. It becomes sin when you believe your doubts.
Early in my Christian life, I found myself doubting often. I would do something I knew didn’t please God, and heart-searching questions always followed my sin. How could you do that and really be a Christian? If there’s a God, then why do these things keep happening?
A few days after I became a Christian, I found myself in my room crying out to God. Doubts flooded my soul. Is there a God? Have you been brainwashed? Have you simply had an emotional experience? I felt so confused. I called on God. It seemed like the only words I could say in those moments were, “Jesus, O Jesus, help me!” After crying out to God for several minutes, peace like a river flooded my soul. The Holy Spirit bore witness with my spirit that I was a child of God. I knew that I knew that Christ was real. It was deeper than emotion and broader than human understanding. It was a spiritual knowledge.
The Christian life is a journey. All along the way, you make discoveries. You continue to learn and grow. The person who does not grow always ends up defeated. Many of my greatest discoveries about the Christian life have come as I’ve had to deal with doubts. I’ve learned to let doubt lead me to new heights of faith, not force me to depths of despair.
I’ve also learned to identify the source of doubts. Before I came to know Christ, the source of my doubts was deep. Of a profoundly spiritual nature, they went to the core of my being. I doubted because I had no vital relationship with God. I didn’t have the assurance of God because I had no knowledge of God. God is Spirit. His Spirit wasn’t present in my life. But after becoming a believer, the doubts that I experienced were more superficial. The deepest part of mankind is the spirit of man. I no longer doubted on that level because “His Spirit bears witness with my spirit that I am a child of God” (Romans 8:16). In the deepest part of my being, I know I am a child of God because the Holy Spirit lives in the deepest part of my heart.
He continually tells me that I’m God’s child, that the blood of Christ is the sufficient provision to cleanse me of all my sins. This isn’t just positional theology, it’s practical reality. Hallelujah! God’s Spirit dwells deep within and continually tells me that I belong to Jesus and He belongs to me! I just know that I know that I know. It’s deep in my heart, and I just know it. It’s not simply some intellectual knowledge or an emotional feeling. It’s spiritual. It’s His presence in my life.
Then what about the doubts? Where do they come from? Although I have that deep assurance that Jesus is mine, I still have to deal with surface doubts. Those doubts come from areas of my life such as the intellectual and emotional. When I disobey God, it always leaves an intellectual or emotional scar. So I may begin to question if I am truly God’s child. Though I know in the deepest part of my heart that Christ’s death on the cross is sufficient for my forgiveness, my reasoning often becomes scarred. I can begin to doubt that I’m a child of God. Or I may feel emotionally defeated and thus doubt that I truly have eternal life. But once the sin has been confessed and I’ve truly repented, I again rest in the confidence of Christ’s salvation. The doubts were only surface. Thus they were also temporary.
Intellectual doubts normally stem from an incorrect view of God, while emotional doubts come from wrong actions and attitudes. Rather than believing what the Bible says about God, we often believe what our culture teaches. Consequently, we become defeated. Every victory we experience in Christ emanates from faith. Faith is the foundation on which victory is built. But that faith foundation can be built only on the truth of God’s Word. We must stand on the Bible’s promises  to experience victory over doubts.
Intellectual doubts may flow from a lack of knowledge of God’s Word, but emotional doubts are often caused by disobeying the Word. By faith in Christ, we have entered into a relationship with God. We become His child. But when we allow sin into our lives, our intimacy with Him is broken. We no longer experience the depth, width, breadth, and height of His love. While His love for us hasn’t changed and we are still His children, our fellowship with Him has been shattered. That fellowship can be restored when we confess and repent of our sins. It’s only when traveling the highway of holiness that we have intimacy with God.
When we believe what God says about us and live and act on those great truths, we will experientially know that we are His children. Doubts will disappear. Faith will grow. And victory will be our battle cry. We will know what it means to be victors.